Canadutch
The title means ‘I DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOU’, and that is what I’ve been feeling a lot of lately. Yeah, this is another language rant.
I feel like a coma patient who woke up and suddenly has to learn their language all over again, err… only it’s not my language. I regretfully spent so long living in here Holland and tuning out the language that now that I want to interact and understand it frustrates me when I can’t.
For years I just avoided the language. It was too difficult, I thought that if I learned it I would be telling Xander that I never want to leave. There was a plethora of reasons why I avoided it, but avoid it I did and I did it well. People around me could be speaking and I wouldn’t hear a word they said. If the radio or TV was on I turned a deaf ear and ignored it.
I know, it was stupid… don’t ask me to explain why I felt that way. Even I have no idea now, after the fact.
There came a point where that changed though. I think once I realized that was here for good and that this is the language I’d be living at least part of my life in. I had heard about Dutch classes given by the government so I went and asked to be enrolled. I had to ask, because I am Canadian and they figure I can get by because I speak English, everyone else is forced to take them. They went on about how they are intensive Dutch classes and I was ready, I was pumped!
Those intensive Dutch classes turned out to be lame ass, get refugees off welfare, bare minimum so they can get out to work – Dutch lessons. UGH! I did learn more and it really helped my confidence with speaking the language but it was nothing like I expected. After a year I finished the course at the top of my class and moved on.
I didn’t know enough Dutch to really carry on proper conversations and I certainly didn’t know enough to work in the language… I knew just enough to get by.
That was a few years ago and between speaking English at home and a general lack of socialization with the Dutch, my skills haven’t improved that much. Sure, I know more words and can speak more than when I was fresh out of that course but I am still far from fluent and am pitifully behind after being here for almost 9 years.
I’m sure if I was Japanese, Turkish or Moroccan I’d be fluent by now, but knowing English is a curse in a way, because it makes it easy to avoid speaking the native language when you don’t want to.
Now, I’ve reached an awkward stage. I know quite a lot of Dutch, I can understand most of what goes on around me when I am out and about, and I can carry on small conversations with neighbours and such. What ticks me off is that I don’t know enough to get a job working in Dutch and there are still times when I’m completely lost. I can talk to one person without any issues, then a few minutes later try to speak to someone else and don’t seem to understand a word they say. It frustrates me!
I can’t turn a deaf ear to the language anymore and I can’t tune it out. I understand enough now to be irritated when I come across things I don’t know yet. I want to learn more and understand everything that goes on around me. I want those insignificant conversations and situations back!
For example… the other day I was out and saw a man with his son. The kid did something cute and I wanted to make a passing comment to the man. He knew I saw it and was looking at me and in any normal situation the passer by would say something. I knew exactly what I wanted to say in English but was stopped in my tracks when I realized if I was going to say anything it would have to be in Dutch… and I didn’t know how to say what I wanted to say to him. So instead I gave an awkward smile and a look that tried to tell him ‘hey, I saw it, just because I’m not saying anything doesn’t mean I didn’t see how cute your kid is!’.
I want more Dutch. I crave it. I do try to speak it as much as possible when I am out but I need something more… and god love Xander, but trying to learn from him is a painful experience because he is too much of a perfectionist. He won’t let me just be understood in the beginning, I need to be perfect… and that just leads to me telling him (in English) where he can stick it. Trying to learn from him is like asking someone how to microwave a piece of pizza and then sitting through a 20 minute explanation on how to make pizza dough from scratch. He tries, but he is completely incapable of simplifying and he just confuses me more than when I started.
I need a course, a REAL course. One that makes you learn the language on a higher level than just learning how to ask for chicken in the supermarket. I want to LIVE this language. I am so flippin’ done with being a permanent tourist in this country language wise… I’m ready to be one of the locals.
alala – I try to tell Xander that too, that he needs to correct me but not correct every single attempt I make. He means well but he’s one of those super intelligent geeky guys who just finds it really hard to ‘dumb it down’. :P
Bluefish – I do speak Dutch to Dutch people when I am out but I don’t speak to people simply for the purpose of practicing Dutch. I think it’s because those are the situations I am nervous in. When someone is actively listening to how I speak the language.
Monica – They give classes here at the volksuniversiteit for NT2 (Nederlands als een tweede taal). I’m seriously considering going there to get that certificate. There are 5 levels before you get the NT2 and I was on lvl 3 when I left that bogus course a few years ago.
Kim – That quote is totally true. The language limits my world in so many different ways. It’s sad really.
Zhu – I’m Canadian and you couldn’t PAY me to live in Quebec :P
Jill – The Dutch G’s will come. Once you get over the feeling of how utterly ridiculous you feel trying to make that sound hehe
I am trying so hard with the Dutch language but OMG, it’s so frustrating. I understand quite a bit more than I can actually speak. I’m able to pick out enough words out of someone’s sentence to get the general idea of what they’re saying. If I could just manage those Dutch “G’s”, I’d be doing a whole lot better. It will happen in time though. Practice won’t make me perfect, but it’ll definitely get me to a point of being able to say a complete sentence without people looking at me like I just coughed up something furry!
Dutchiestyles last blog post… Why yes, those are black circles under my eyes…
Oh, I feel for you… been there, done that (although not in Dutch, but plain boring English).
I kinda spoke English when I first came to Canada but my first language (after French) is Chinese, that I learned at school instead of English. So much for believing in Communism, I really wished at the time I had taken English like everybody else! :lol:
I went to a couple of “new landed immigrants” classes like you because I wasn’t doing much during my first year in Canada. But I discovered the catch 22: I was way too advanced for the class (mostly refugees and illiterate people who were given basic tools to get by) yet I wasn’t fluent enough to be comfortable being interviewed in English, to read English books etc.
That was in 2002 and I think I’m okay now. I didn’t do anything special, just tried to read a lot etc.
Living in French in Canada wasn’t an option for me because 1) I’m not in Quebec 2) I wanted to belong 3) Being a French-speaker and not being Quebecer is an awkward place to be.
So hang in there! I know Dutch is hard (well, I assume, sounds like alien-language to me!) but you will make it.
There’s a quote I think is appropriate here:
“The limits of my language is the limits of my world.”
Sorry but I can’t remember who said it right now!
Kim Hs last blog post… Catch Up
People here who want to learn English can go to a place like a community college and take courses designed to get students ready for university classes. You can take classes for whatever level of English you’re at. See if that’s available somewhere. My husband says probably not but hey, give it a try.
Hi, maybe you can find Dutch friends or find other foreigners to practice with. I wish you all the best and hope your Dutch will improve a lot soon. Take care.
Yeah, I get you. I do speak German, sort of, but I can’t write it, and I can only read it until I come across a word I don’t understand and then it’s good-bye. I am already determined to do it RIGHT when I get to the Netherlands: classes, children’s books, keeping a dictionary on hand, the whole shebang.
Note from a certified ESL teacher (me) to Xander: ONE error per sentence is the rule. Pick one mistake, correct it quickly, and move on. Otherwise students get overwhelmed and shut you out.
alalas last blog post… temporary fade