Tantrums & Rants

That’s how long until the first day of Autumn.  It sounds like a long time but it’s not really, and we’ve not even had a summer yet (we didn’t last year either).   I want to go back to France, where it was warm and dry.   Barring my horrid sunburn, I loved it there… and I only got the burn because …

You know, I’m not the most worldly person.   I’ve traveled around a bit but I generally don’t keep up on the politics and news in other countries.  Hell, I hardly pay attention to the news in my own country, so overall when it comes to current affairs I’m a giant ignoramus.   Something had me confused the other night though,  and …

I love my mom and dad, but I’ve decided that they’ve passed down some pretty rotten genes. I have my great grandmother from my mother’s side, Grannie’s, ass.  I know this because my sister has the same ass as me and Grannie is the only person I can think of when I go up the family tree that had one …

Oh my god, the DAY after I write the rant about the shit ninjas I’m out with the dogs and the very dog I suspected runs out and shits RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME on the sidewalk.   Other than trying to housebreak Pixel I have never in my life been so happy to see a dog have a crap! Not …

There is something that’s been bugging me for a while, and I’m so about to rant about it. At the moment the walkway in front of our building is like a minefield of dog shit.   When we are going to the car or walking the dogs we have to watch every step we take because there is dog shit everywhere… …

The title means ‘I DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOU’,  and that is what I’ve been feeling a lot of lately.  Yeah, this is another language rant. I feel like a coma patient who woke up and suddenly has to learn their language all over again, err… only it’s not my language.    I regretfully spent so long living in here Holland and …

Yesterday (my birthday!) we decided to come home.  We’d been in France for over a week and were both feeling like we were getting a little tired of sight seeing.   It was time to pack up and head home so that we could be home in time to have a nice long weekend to chill out before returning to work. …

This is me. This is me counting to ten. This is me killing everyone in my immediate surroundings in a PMS Rage. Today I am home having my turn to be with the plumbers and welders that are working on the pipes in the building.   What started out as a leak in our bathroom has turned into a leak in …

Today I was in a great mood at work, which was pretty remarkable considering it was a Monday.   On my lunch break I started realizing the world was working against me. No, that’s a lie, I really started noticing it on Saturday. We were leaving our flat and the sun was shining.  I commented as we were walking out of …

A snippet from my Spats section: Dogs Balls – Repeated Since Bailey turned six months old Xander and I have had an ongoing argument about his balls. I want to get him fixed, Xander doesn’t. Now I understand it’s just male instinct to want to preserve all testicles on the planet, but there must be limits. Where I come from …

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!  Would someone please tell Paula Abdul that there is no such word as NITCH?!  I swear, every time that dumb bitch opens her mouth I want to scream, but when she says ‘You have found your NITCH’ I want to go all unibomber on her ass.  GAWD!!  How do they let her continue to do …