Frazzled

I’m sitting here on my sofa, wrapped in a blanket with a birds nest for hair and droopy eyes. I’m tired.

For the last number of days I haven’t managed to get a full nights sleep even once. Yesterday morning I was woken up at 3:30am by the sounds of my dog puking in his bed, which I got up and cleaned up. Then was awoken again by his whining just after falling asleep. I knew something had to be wrong so I got up and let him out of the bedroom, after which he ran into the livingroom and had a giant dump on the floor. Thank god our livingroom floor is tiled. He continued to be sick and after cleaning up the massive dump, I was awake anyway.

I tried to have a nap later in the morning but was woken up by the phone.

Every other morning for the past week or so I’ve been woken up by Spencer. I think it’s time to put him back on his crazy pills again because I’m at that point again where it’s that or wake up in a rage some morning and strangle the life out of him. Ok I wouldn’t actually strangle him but goddamn it he’s making me insane.

This morning he started at about 5am, standing outside our bedroom door meowing loudly and scratching incessantly at the door. Xander sleeps through it because he wears earplugs to bed, but they hurt my ears so I can’t wear them. Instead, I lay there on my side, trying desperately not to wake up too much. I have one ear in my pillow and try to bunch up my blankets over the top ear to muffle the sounds of his nonstop-fucking-meowing. It doesn’t work though.

This morning I layed there with my ears covered, staring at my bedside table thinking of what I could throw at the door to startle him and give myself 2-3 minutes of silence.

My options were:

• A plastic glass half filled with water, which wouldn’t have worked because unless I wanted to make a mess I’d have to drink the water, and I already had to pee as it was.
• My lamp. That was a no go because I’d have to get up and unplug it, take the bulb out and by that time I’d be wide awake.
• My teddybear (Ok yes I’m 31 years old and still sleep with a teddybear), but throwing a teddybear at the door isn’t going to startle anyone. Plus, while I know teddybears don’t have feelings, I don’t have the heart to chuck him across the room like that. So sue me, I’m a freak.
• Books. I always have at least 2-3 books hanging around on my nightstand, they’d be the perfect shit-scaring missiles!! The only problem was that they would make a noise loud enough that Xander would hear. Like I wanted that agro.

I laid there with nothing to throw, clutching my teddy and temporarily hating Xander almost as much as the cat because not only did he manage to sleep through it, but he ruined my book chucking plan too.

So I got up, defeated… I am their bitch. I got out of bed and fed them, anything to not hear those cat cries for just a few minutes.