HERPES!

This morning I woke up with a little friend… a cold sore.  GROSS, I have herpes!! 

Herpes simplex is commonly referred to as cold sores or fever blisters. It is a viral infection of the skin that may occur once or return again and again. This is because when the virus is cleared from the skin by the immune system it hides in the nerves and is never completely removed from the body. Herpes infections are very common. It is estimated that nine out of ten people have been exposed to herpes. Many people are infected and don’t even know it. Unfortunately those who carry herpes can spread the disease without even knowing it.

I know cold sores are totally common, I see people with them all the time and I don’t even blink an eye… but this is different, it’s ME and I’m paranoid as hell!  

I’m not able to give other people the benefit of the doubt that they’ll not blink an eye at my temporary infection…  inside I’ll be convinced that they will be looking at me and imagining me kneeling next to a hole in a public bathroom wall or spending my evenings making out with diseased homeless people.

I feel dirty.

This is not the first time I’ve had a cold sore, mind you, but the embarrassment and paranoia hasn’t lessened any since the first time.   I think perhaps some ruthless teenage boy may have made fun of me and I’ve repressed it.

I’ve considered pretending to be Muslim for a few days.  I mean this IS Rotterdam, so it’s not like anyone would notice one more short little fat woman running around in all that Muslim garb.  

I don’t think I could pull it off though…

If I was thinner and had a really rockin’ bod, I’d dress in one of those genie costumes with the face covering.   When you look that hot nobody would think to wonder why, they’d be too busy checking you out.

Obviously, can’t pull that off either.

There’s no hiding from this.  I have no choice but to walk around and carry this glowing infestation…. which normally wouldn’t have bothered me at all, because I could just stay inside and avoid the world for a few days.   Now that I’m working again, that’s not an option.   I have no choice but to travel through the city and face my new friends and workmates.

If they stare too much I’ll just threaten to kiss them.